Thursday, July 11, 2013

Southwest Airlines

     The terminal in Burbank, California is so small, it is next to non-existent. If you wanted to run a mile, you could probably just run up and down the whole airport a couple times and you'd be good.

     After going through the three-lane security check in, I quickly got to my gate, as it was only ten meters from the x-ray.

     I had no reading material to occupy me for the next four hours. (The flight to Vegas was an hour, the layover one and a half hours, and the flight to Boise an equal amount of time. Correct my math if I'm wrong.) I purchased the latest issues of Wired and Popular Mechanics and leisurely waited for a while.

     As soon as I stepped off the plane, I knew I was in Vegas. Six feet from the gate, only six feet, were slot machines. On top of that, there were more bars than one could count. I just thought this was funny, since Burbank and Boise simply have the occasional arcade game, and sometimes a candy store.

     Now, I call this post Southwest Airlines because that's the company I flew with. Also, since I was likely to forget the things said, I didn't want to wait to make a list for Friday.

     There are several things that make me appreciate Southwest over the competition.

     First off, it's pretty much the only airline I've flown with. It's hard to like something else when you haven't tried it, I suppose. But even so, there are still some pretty good things about Southwest.

     When I flew down to Arizona last year, I flew with a different airline besides Southwest. My aunt and uncle had to pay a whole extra $100, just because I was only 14. Southwest, however, waived that fee. They don't give a crap (thankfully). So I like Southwest because of the lack of tacked-on fees.

     Probably the biggest reason I appreciate Southwest is because the crew and captains tend to be more comical. Other airlines may do this, but of the three others I've gone with, they didn't.

     This is the part I was likely to forget reeeeeeal soon.

     Since I don't have very good memory, and the flights were yesterday, I'm just going to spew these out really fast.

"Hold on to your hat and lose your cash, because we're in Vegas!"

"Oxygen masks will drop down, just pull it around your head and breath normally. After you get the mask on, ladies, please be willing to help your husband, boyfriend, child, and or Boise State Fan."

"In the pocket on the seat in front of you you will find a safety pamphlet. Please take some time to read this. If you don't feel like reading, it has plenty of pretty pictures."

     Crap. Starting to forget them now. Let me see...

(To the tune of that song that I only know from Barney)
"We love you
You love us
We're much faster than the bus
We hope you enjoyed our hospitality
Marry one of us and you'll fly free"

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are landing right now, and have a very full flight. Right outside the windows are our competitors, so if you could just kindly put your face right smack-dab in the window for us, to show them we're awesome, that'd be great."

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